14
Jul
08

Roots

This post may appear to be funny, based on this:

But, it’s really not so much. 

Because it represents this person who’s no longer in my life. This person who was once such a huge part of my life we may as well have been married. A best friend, like a sister kind of person. A talk-to-on-the-phone-every-day kind of person. A person who leaves a big, gaping hole in your life when she is no longer in it.

I have written about her struggle with addiction here and there and how it has affected me. Maybe I’ve blabbed too much to the Internet. (We all know how well Ms. Internet keeps secrets.)

The friendship has been over for a while, but I was too busy paddling against the current on the River DeNiAl. When I finally fell overboard and the shock of reality woke me up, I went through a whole range of emotions: anxiety, anger, mourning and finally acceptance.

After her own personal efforts to seek help failed, family and friends intervened. After two months, it was apparent our efforts were less than effective. She had played us. She had outwitted us all, the dimwits that we are, I guess.

This outwitting really stung and hurt and enraged many of us who had exerted so much energy to help her. However, it appears cosmic justice has banged her gavel. Just desserts have been served on a cold, hard platter. By this time, I have learned how to live without her. No e-mail. No phone calls. I’ve had one exchange of mail, which included a small card featuring the above odd carrot character. The written message inside was nonsense and told me nothing.

For all those things in life that remain an enigma wrapped in a mystery, I offer this nugget courtesy of the late Mr. Rudyard Kipling:

The cure of an ill is not to sit still,
or frowst with a book by the fire;
But to take a large hoe and shovel also,
And dig till you gently pespire.

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4 Responses to “Roots”


  1. July 15, 2008 at 2:25 am

    Oh man, I’m sorry. One very big addiction story in our extended family turned out very happily, with the addicted person now married with children and a home. Sometimes things do turn around after the hell.

    I wish you the best possible outcome.

    — Laurie @ Foolery

  2. 2 mom zombie
    July 15, 2008 at 3:23 am

    Thanks. I’m preparing to run away with the carrot man from the circus.

    –MZ

  3. July 15, 2008 at 5:47 pm

    Mom Zombie, yes I have (had) a friend much the same as yours. It’s sad, it’s frustrating, it’s such a waste. It’s hard to let go. Does carrot man have a brother that is good with plumbing, by the way?
    Hope that your friend gets better. My heart goes out to you.
    Liz

  4. 4 mom zombie
    July 16, 2008 at 4:45 am

    Alias LIz Jones: Don’t know about a brother, but carrot man probably could rock a good plumber’s butt!

    –MomZombie


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