22
Jun
08

boobies

This evening the entire family gathered around the table and smothered our faces in fresh, ripe young …. boobies.

Sometimes, when we are feeling decadent, we like to squirt whipped cream on them for flavor enhancement. Yesterday we mixed it up with a scoop of ice cream and a dollop of heavy cream. We just can’t seem to get enough.

Please don’t think I’ve stooped to a new low in order to attract attention to this humble little blog.

What I’m really talking about are these:

Not these:

For god’s sake, what kind of people do you think we are anyhow? I’ll have you know we are vegetarians!

Anyone who’s maneuvered a pre-schooler through the language development phase knows that simple, simple words are fertile territory for producing “Oh.No.” moments. We had just gotten past the knife, “fuck” and spoon cycle. And the we-tell-time-by-looking-at-the “cock” stage. And now here we are, fumbling in the “booby” zone.

The “boobies” thing is out of control.

Back story: Somewhere along the way, we started sprinkling blueberries on her yogurt. These quickly were renamed “booobies.” Then raspberries came into season. Still, it was “booobies.” Now, it’s strawberry time and the passion is mounting.

It’s gotten so that I run through the produce section and quickly grab a package of strawberries before Girl from the East can spot the mounds of red berries and bellow: “BOOOBIES! MOMMA, ME WANT BOOOBIES.” for all the hear and process.

Redirect and correct, you say? We’ve slowly pronounced and enunciated the word strawberry to her. Over and over. It’s not working.

I pray for autumn.

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3 Responses to “boobies”


  1. July 13, 2008 at 4:18 pm

    Hey Mom Zombie, I could rant for hours on the subject of poor quality goods that we’re sold. Free trade agreement I think, or greed or something. Sorry about all of your recalls. That’s irritating. Good luck on getting the bed replaced. Seems that corporate America or China or whomever doesn’t really make it easy, or care to.

  2. 2 mom zombie
    July 13, 2008 at 7:32 pm

    Thanks, Alias Liz Jones, for reading my rant. I forgot to mention the multitude of Nalgene bottles I had to toss last week, all of which are full of toxins.

  3. 3 Jess
    August 27, 2008 at 11:10 pm

    Boobies- I love it!

    I sort of miss those goofy, funny things they say at that age.

    My younger guy, now 5, seemed to be REALLY interested in my little talk about leaving apple cores and other food for the flies to eat. Then it was his turn and it became clear that he had only been patiently waiting to ask me “Are there vegetable flies, too?”

    His embarrassing things tend to be more in the peeking-under-bathroom-stall line…


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