08
Nov
07

One-year analysis

It’s been one year.

— since I left the workforce. Funny, things seem to be moving along just fine without me.

— since we expanded our family to include Girl from the East. It’s as if she’s been with us always. And yet, we all have so much to learn. We’ve had our observations, our reunions, our celebratory dinners. It’s wonderful to know Baby Girl has been withus longer than without us.

One year has passed.
Oh, I thought I’d have so much more accomplished.
This is a perfect of example of how my husband says I’m a “glass half-empy” kind of person.
I call myself a perfectionist. He says I’m negative.
By now, I envisioned myself having found a Plan B following the end of nearly 20 years of newspapering. I’d have a plan sketched out somewhere on how I was going to accomplish this new life direction.
Well, I have some rough drafts in my head but nothing set in ink or based in any kind of reality. Is that good enough for one year off work?

A year later, I was going to be 25 pounds thinner on my new exercise regimen. Well, not quite at that goal but still working toward it.

We did get some major projects done around the house: new basement windows, a major plumbing leak resolved, finished painting the garage, reigned in some of the major lawn and garden issues.

But glass-half empty me sees so much more that sits untouched: Baby Girl’s bedroom ceiling which is cracked and in desperate need of new paint. The broken, 25-year-old celing fan that hasn’t been replaced. The major water damage on the west end of our home. All the baseboard moldings and doors that need either full repaints or touch up.

Right now I’ve resigned myself to getting from one day to the next.
Yes, it sounds negative. But only to the long-term planner, the visionary. That would be my husband. Not much gets him down.

Maybe to the sick, the addicted, the messed up, having a one-day-at-a-time philosophy is the only way to get through it. That and a nice wine tree in your yard.

Girl from the West is going through some hard times right now: middle-school angst involving girls who once were your friends now who are not due to changes in attitude; she’s also preparing for a major adventure next summer and this involveds paperwork, planning, fund-raising of thousands of dollars.

I find taking care of two girls, one a teen and one a toddler, is full-time in itself. I find taking care of a smallish house on a fairly big corner lot is a full-time endeavor in itself. Finding time for me is just not happening right now. Me time for exercise, reading, writing, exploring new avenues all must be accomplished between the hours of 10 p.m. and 1 a.m. No longer my best hours. More and more lately, I’m opting to sleep.

So, in analysis, I’ve accomplished some things in my year off work. I’ve helped Girl from the West get her academic life on track. I’ve helped Girl from the East attach and bond to her new, forever family. We’ve gotten caught up on a number of home projects. We survived a year of one income. I’ve lost some weight and gained a level of fitness.

Looking at the glass as half-full is going to take some more work on my part.

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